I am in Gratitude

The last two months have been jammed packed with activity and I am only now getting a chance to sit down and blog.  Actually, I have no choice but to take a moment, as I threw my back out recently and my activity is at a minimum.  October was a very busy month with two very successful shows and many marching band events for my son.  Halloween and Thanksgiving have come and gone.  The news is jam packed with politics, the Syrian refugee crisis and the great red cup debate.  Much is going on around me, but now, as I sit alone in a quiet house, I cannot but sink deep into my thoughts. I have much to be grateful for this holiday season.  I have been blessed with the precious gift of life. The other day I began thinking about having had cancer and how one year has passed since I discovered a lump in my breast.  It was around the time of my 45th birthday.  This coming January, I will have my first mammogram since my surgery and cancer free diagnosis this past May.  There are times where I feel outside of myself and that all that I and my family experienced was lifetimes ago. There are times when it seems like yesterday. I also have moments where I feel like it never happened.  I guess that would be hard to understand unless you have actually experienced it.   Perhaps, this is the strange way of coping with it all. I know it all had a purpose. Everything does. Sometimes, I feel that I'm understanding why this all happened and that I am living from a place of peace.  Then, I have days where I feel completely disconnected from my Soul and find myself behaving from my ego, sweating the small stuff and worrying about trivial things that I should have released long ago. When this happens, I feel tremendous guilt that I am somehow not honoring all that I have been though and the gift that the Divine has given to me.  I feel that as a survivor, I should transcend earthly desires and headaches, and operate at a higher level.  That is when I have to remind myself that I am only human.  My biggest struggle as it has always been is to be present.  Cancer made me present.  I had no choice.  I could only live each day as if there were no guarantees.  Now, I find myself looking toward the future more and more in an attempt to manifest, while in reality, all that I can manifest is today.  All I can do is trust that all of my needs and my family's needs are being met in perfect, Divine timing.  I was able to trust so wholeheartedly during the journey.  I had to.  It was as if I were clinging to a branch, fearing the fall, but knowing it was strong enough to hold me.  I have moments where I want to fly, moments where I can't seem to control my thoughts and emotions, and every world leaks out of my mouth before I've had time to self-check if it is appropriate.  I am me.  I am completely authentic and unafraid.  Perhaps, that is what I needed to learn.  I'm not sure.  I am certain of one thing.  I am grateful.  I am grateful for all that has passed and all that is yet to come. I am grateful to my dear husband, who held me up when I feared I would fall.  He has loved me unconditionally and through the hell of cancer.  I know that he will love me though anything.  Thank you, Andy.  I am grateful to my son for his strength and beautiful spirit.  I am grateful to my family, neighbors and friends who supported me through my journey, who prayed for me, who made me laugh and went above and beyond for me.  I am truly blessed by all of you.  I grateful to my guides, angels and the Universe for all that you have taught to me and all that you still teach me.  Gratitude is where I wish to remain, for in gratitude, I have all that I could ever need. In gratitude, I am blessed.

New Art

New Art !!!

Under the Harvest Moon

Original, open edition and limited edition Giclee available at 

https://www.etsy.com/listing/250196423/original-painting-under-the-harvest-moon?ref=shop_home_active_1

Raven Mad 

From Under the Harvest Moon

Available as a limited edition Giclee only 

Closing the book

One of the reasons I am taking a short break from weekly oracle card readings is that I just had port removal surgery.  In fact, it was yesterday.  I'm a bit sore today, but wanted to write about this part of my cancer journey coming to a close.  In many ways, it is the final chapter, although, I do realize that the book never really closes, metaphorically speaking.  I will still be dealing with follow-up visits to my team of doctors, as well as the emotions.   As I said, yesterday was my port removal procedure.  I have mentioned synchronicity before with regards to this journey and yesterday was one of those moments.  Let me back track to the day before surgery.  A friend of mine sent me a facebook message about angels watching over me and to forward this message to others, etc.  I'm not a big one for these types of things, because in essence they are chain mail messages and in many ways perpetuate fear.  If you don't do this, this will occur, or if you do forward this, something wonderful will occur.  No offence to the dear one who sent the message to me, as her heart was in the right place. Normally, I do not send these out, but because I was scheduled for surgery the following day, I allowed my paranoia to take over and decided, why not.  I could use a little heavenly watching over. I sent the messages, closed up my kindle and made my way out the door to pick up my son from band camp.  Here is the irony.  I open the door, and just as I am about to take my first step outside, a feather lands at my feet.  My eyes went immediately to this small grey and white feather, something I may have missed under any other circumstances.  I picked it up and ran back into the house to show my husband.  I was covered with cold chills and immediately thanked the Universe for its message.  I placed the feather in my lucky acorn box for safe keeping.  You might remember me blogging about finding a feather on the first day of my chemo treatment.  Well, as it turns out, my port surgery was 4 months to the day that I finished my last chemo. For those who do not know what a port is, it is a device used to inject chemo into the body. So, it was very apropos that I would have the port removed on 8/28.  Even more interesting was that the doctor who performed the insertion of my port was the same doctor to remove it.  Okay, maybe that isn't that strange, but I thought it was profound. I chose to remain awake for this procedure, unlike the first time.  The first time, I had mild sedation, because it was the first time I had ever had any kind of surgical procedure and I was a basket case of fear.  Not that I wasn't nervous about the removal.  However, after everything I have been through the last 8 months, I find myself more on the side of brave than fear.  Yeah for brave!  The procedure went very well.  Other than the shots of numbing agent and the weird sensation of what the doctor was actually doing, I laughed and joked with him and his assistant Josh.  Josh prepped me for the procedure and got me nice and relaxed by playing Dave Matthews in the background.  Josh is a big DM fan and talked about the concerts he'd been to and showed me a tattoo on his lower arm that pertained to DM.  Very cool dude.  He is into synchronicity too and we talked a bit about that.  I got him teary eyed when I shared a story of when I had first been diagnosed with cancer, my husband danced with me to DM's, You and Me, and how he promised we would dance to it again when all this was over. When the doctor finished sewing me up, a DM song was playing.  I wish I could remember the name of it, but I remember the words having to do with change and choices and moving forward. Seems appropriate.

So, as I close the chapter on this book, I now move forward into the next book and pray for no sequels.  Off to go share a dance with my husband.

The Door Opener and retreat

Hi everyone.  I'm very excited to announce that my art is on the cover of the fall edition of the Door Opener Magazine!!

Earth Ammonite (c) Trisha Leigh Shufelt

I'm very honored that my art is on the cover of this wonderful magazine.  It is my first cover, and I couldn't be more proud.  Thank you Dory and everyone at the Door Opener.  The Door Opener will be hosting the Soul Light Expo on October 11th at the Crown in Cromwell, CT.  I will have a table with art and goodies, as well as guest speaking about my art and cancer journey.  I hope you will join us for a wonderful day!!

Also, I am taking a bit of retreat of sorts from weekly oracle card readings.  The beginning of September is always a crazy time of year for me.  Back to school, band season, prep work for upcoming fall shows, and the wind down to my birthday.  If you follow astrology, as I know many of my readers do, you know that the month before your birthday is often a winding down period for the birth sign.  We feel more tired than usual, are more reflective and often draw into a cocoon to prepare for our next birth year.  Well, folks, I'm feeling it big time this year.  I need a little me time.  I don't know how long I will be away from oracle posts, and please forgive me.  I know many of you do read them and look forward to them.  I am very grateful that you do enjoy them.  Last week saw the biggest surge in readers.  Thank you! So, I hope you will forgive my short absence.  It shant be long. I am sure I will post from time to time about art and upcoming news.  Take some time to breathe, my friends.  The change of season is nearing as well as another Mercury Retrograde.  Much love!!

Mantra Deck update

The Art in Soul Mantra Cards were a labor of love. The deck contains two separate sets. One is designed as oracle cards, where you shuffle, pull a card at random, and allow your intuitive side to uncover messages. The second deck is a daily draw. It contains 31 cards. At the beginning of the month, shuffle the deck and lay it face down. Each day, pull one card, read the message and the mantra. Meditate upon the meaning and recite the mantra over and over until you feel it become a part of you. This card is from the Oracle set and is the Wisdom card. It says I am connecting to the wisdom of the ancient ones. When I meditate upon this card, I feel the message is letting me know that I am not alone and that I am surrounded by deep wisdom. If I listen carefully, this wisdom is something that has been passed from generation to generation and I can tap into it at anytime. It is the wisdom of my gut knowing that guides me and protects me. We are born with all that we need, and all that is sacred and secret is found within. If you are interested in my Art In Soul Mantra Cards, I have a signed set available though my etsy store at https://www.etsy.com/…/mantra-cards-oracle-cards-by-art-in-…

The card below is from the daily draw set.

Art In Soul Mantra Cards Launch!!! UPDATE!!!

The Art In Soul Mantra Cards will publicly launch tonight (7pm est), but are available for purchase NOW though gamecrafter @ https://www.thegamecrafter.com/games/art-in-soul-mantra-cards  These cards are not signed by me.  I will be offering signed copies in my etsy store in a few weeks. Please, be aware that printing times vary and I have no control over how soon your item will print and ship.

Art In Soul Mantra Deck Launch!!

The Art In Soul Mantra deck will officially launch tomorrow 7/18 at 5pm est!!! Here is a sneak peek of the finished cards.  They may be ordered via this link https://www.thegamecrafter.com/games/art-in-soul-mantra-cards.  I will also be ordering a handful of boxes and will make those available via my etsy store.  Those will be signed.

Coming soon!!! Art In Soul Mantra Cards!!

I'm so excited to announce that my first Mantra/Oracle card set will be available for purchase very soon through Gamecrafter. I've been working very hard on this for quite some time and I know you will all love it. It contains 62 cards in two different set styles. The first set of 31 cards may be used as in a daily draw and features artwork, mantras and inspirational words of wisdom. The second set of 31 cards are more simple and designed like an oracle set. These cards feature mantras and artwork, from which you may use your intuition for guidance on the card message. There is no need for a booklet. The cards come in a beautiful box and are jumbo sized!!! As soon as a proof the first copy, they will be available for purchase at the link below. Please click on the link to see some of the features. https://www.thegamecrafter.com/games/art-in-soul-mantra-cards  Below are examples of the two different styles.  You can view more at the link above.

Mandala Art

I've always loved Mandala Art but never felt confident enough to start creating my own.  This week, I sat down and hammered out two images.  It's much harder than I imagined, but I found the process very rewarding and I will be creating some more images.  These are the first two. The third image is the OM Mandala with Mantras and that is available in my etsy store as a print.  The first two are available on a variety of products through Redbubble.

Bee Mandala

Om Mandala

http://www.redbubble.com/people/artinsoulorg/works/15423632-om-mandala-with-chakra-colors?p=throw-pillow

 https://www.etsy.com/…/om-mandala-mantra-i-am-print-art-pri…

Don't let fear of success hold you back

I decided to speak about my cancer journey at an upcoming Expo this fall.  I'll be there with my art, but this will be the first time I will be speaking publicly about my journey. Other than theater work in HS, and a couple presentations in front of employers when I was in advertising, I have never done this type of thing.  Theater and advertising were easy, because it wasn't personal, and with theater, I was someone else.  While I have blogged about my journey, and spent hours on FB logging thoughts, this will be 45 minutes of raw me in front of strangers.  

In May, my friend Dory, who runs the expo proposed the idea to me.  I was initially surprised and grateful, but told her I would need to give it some thought.  I've been thinking about it for weeks, but wasn't convinced to do anything until this past Monday, after sitting down with the Social Worker from the cancer center where I receive treatment. 

I stopped in her office, per her request, as she wanted to know how I was doing and if there was anything I needed.  This was our first meeting and I felt an immediate comfort level with her.  I suppose it is her job to put people at ease.  So, we got to talking about me, what I do, how I was feeling, and how I got from A to B in this journey.  Through the process, I realized, I had a lot to say and overall, I wanted to say these things to others. 

Prior to my diagnosis, I had many "fears”. The list is quite long, but one of them is the fear of success and the fear of failure.  Everyone fears failure in some way, but how many of us are afraid to succeed?  Actually, I've come to realize that these fears go hand in hand. As an artist, I've been putting myself "out there" for years, but I'll admit that subconsciously, I believe I have created a block to success, because I fear failure.  If I'm not successful, I can't possibly fail.  Sure, I've had my share of successes and they have been wonderful, but the BIG stuff, the stuff I truly want always seems to encounter a roadblock.  I believe it has to do with convincing myself that I am not good enough. Perhaps, it is comparing myself to someone else. Perhaps, it is the feeling that I do not deserve success. I think it is all these things and more.  I have pages and pages of would be novels I've written, but have not put "out there".  I have art in the back of my mind that I want to create, but fear I'm not good enough as an artist to bring it alive.  I want to start my own art gatherings to teach others, but linger in self-doubt, because I am not classically trained.  Who am I to teach others when no one taught me?  Doubt, fear, etc. I've come to realize that this is all an illusion that I have created in my mind from past imprinting and perceptions I have put upon myself.  We all do it, and it is time it needs to stop.  How can you possibly be your best and highest self if you are constantly afraid of facing that person? We face people every day, but we never truly face ourselves.  It's time for everyone to look in the mirror and say you can do anything you set your mind to.  You are worthy of happiness.  You are worthy of abundance.  You are skilled and talented. You have all the tools you need.  Take flight, my friends.  It's time.

Dragonflies and feathers

Today was a good day.  So much accomplished and to see.

New Photography

Adrift (c) 2015 Trisha Leigh Shufelt 

Tiny Turtle 1

(c) 2015 Trisha Leigh Shufelt 

Tiny Turtle 2

(c) 2015 Trisha Leigh Shufelt 

New Art

Dragonflies in three styles

"If you want to sing out.  Sing out.  

And, if you want to be free. Be free. 

 There's million things to be.  

You know that there are." 

Cat Stevens

Just Listen

The Path We Walk Is Our Own Creation (c) Trisha Leigh Shufelt 

Over a year ago, I took a group class taught by my Reiki Instructor that focused on listening.  Our little group met once a month for a year and we read from a book called, A Hidden Wholeness by Parker J. Palmer.  Each week, we would review a chapter, break off in solitude to answer questions in our journals, and then return to the group to give out thoughts.  We were then asked questions.  The questions could not be leading in nature, and as the person answered our questions, we had to simply listen to their response.  We were not allowed to offer advice, a tissue should there be tears (which there often were), or fix, save and rescue.  Eventually, we learned the art of true listening.

Since then, I've tried to apply the techniques I learned when having conversations with others. It is fairly easy with strangers, as the natural boundaries often apply.  When it comes to loved ones and friends, well, that is a different story.  I've gotten better at it, but don't know if I will ever master the the true art of listing.  I think each sex has their own tough time with it.  It is hard for women, as it is in our nature to nurture and heal.  Men always want to fix, save and rescue.  However, I think it important to realize that the most important thing we can do for another person is to simply listen, and remove ourselves from the desire to fix, save and rescue.  It is important to realize that this person you are listening to is walking their own path.  It is their journey, not your own.  Once you begin trying to fix, save and rescue, you take on the burden of their karma.  It now becomes your own and this is something you do not want or need.  As an empath, I am unlearning this habit.  It is not easy.  If we are to grow as individuals and learn our Soul lessons, we must allow others to make mistakes, have triumphs of their own, and walk their own journey.  Of course, if you see someone in a dangerous situation, it is wise to offer guidance, but remember that even if you do, they may not always heed your advice. Sometimes they will fall regardless of your help, but hopefully in the falling they will have learned a very valuable lesson.  Sometimes, you will see those you love get stuck in self-destructive patterns.  This could be on the work front, in personal relationships, or within themselves.  It is difficult to watch someone go though these things, especially when it affects you directly.  Our instinct is to try and help, perhaps get angry and project our own fears, or become passive aggressive.  I've been there, and the only thing I could do was realize this person had to work it out for themselves.  I asked questions that would allow them to think about the situation, but not offer advice on how to fix it. When I did this, I found that the person eventually began to see these patterns themselves and work to fix them on their own.  Eventually, they realized their hand in it all. Situations are not simply happening to you.  We all have a part to play in what is going on around us, and patterns will continue to repeat until we realize the lessons we need to learn.  Once we learn, the patterns stop.

So, the next time you find yourself in a situation where you want to fix, save and rescue, try to just listen.  Ask non leading questions (questions that do not project your emotions of how you want the person to respond).  It takes practice, but over time, it will allow the person you love to evolve into their best and highest self.  After all, this is what we all want and need.

A walk along the path

What is this trying to teach me?

This may be a long blog.  I've been thinking about my reading for this past week and I've had some time to retreat into my thoughts.  One of the things that I have been thinking about is why things happen when they do.  Anyone who knows me or follows my blog has heard me say repeatedly that everything happens for a reason, or it is what it is. I used to hate the "is what it is" saying, because for the longest time, I felt it denoted a lack of control. Yes, sometimes things happen that seem to be beyond our control, but in truth, we are the ones who are in control at all times.  How is that possible if bad things happen?  I didn't bring this upon myself? I didn't ask for this disease, to be treated unfairly, or to get into this accident, etc.  No, you may not have asked for a particular thing to happen to you, but you do have the power to control your response to any given situation.  Sometimes, things happen to move us and shake us out of situations that no longer serve our highest good.  They can be slow coming or they can be huge, jarring wake-up calls.  It just depends on what we need at that time. These things happen to us personally and they happen on a global scale.  They will continue happening until we make the necessary changes to remove ourselves from the situation.  If we don't, the Universe often does it for us.  This is not necessarily a bad thing, although it may feel like it at the time. If you are constantly unhappy where you are in life.  If you are filled with negative emotions about your current situation, then this emotion is setting in motion a change.  We are not meant to be unhappy and miserable.  For example, I had a job that I loved for many years.  I sort of fell into it and it became a very rewarding experience for me.  I changed the lives of many children that I worked with and felt that it was my calling in life.  One day, my boss informed me that the grant for my position was ending within a year and that my services would no longer be needed.  They wanted to keep me on during that year, but would remove me from my position, and put me into another, as those in higher authority deemed that my position should be filled with someone who had a degree. It was beyond their control.  I was devastated.  I couldn't understand why this was being taken away from me. It cut me to my core. Well, you could say, this is not a good example of being in a miserable situation and emotions in motion creating change. However, it was. While I loved what I did, I felt unchallenged at times, sometimes unappreciated and in the end, I wanted more. The Universe answered.  I tried the new position, but ended up leaving, because, it began to take a toll on my health. After leaving, I tried everything I could to get back into the field, but found it impossible.  Over time, I soon began to realize I would never return to this line of work.  I was meant to move on to other things, and I stopped resisting the change that needed to occur.  Everything happens for a reason.  I allowed myself to realize that I had been blessed to learn what I did from that experience, but in order to learn more, I had to stop allowing the fear of what if control me.  I was afraid the income loss would be difficult for our family.  I felt like I wasn't contributing enough.  I felt I lacked skills to move forward.  I feared.  I feared. I feared.  I also realize that it was fear that kept me in my job for many years.  Eventually, I decided to throw myself completely into my art and healing.  I allowed the Universe to guide me and I openly accepted where I would go.  I relinquished my need to control. Today, I am following my passion.  No, it is not as lucrative as my old job, but we are doing fine and I am happy. Another example is the breast cancer diagnosis I received this past year.  No, I did not ask for breast cancer, but I learned a great deal from it.  It changed my life forever and I will say, for the better.  I look at life very differently now.  It has made me fear less and love more.  I have learned to trust that everything happens in Divine timing and for the highest and best good.  I have learned that it is my response to life that makes a difference on where it leads me. So, while things may seem grim, ask what is this situation trying to teach me? What do I need to learn?  What do I need to overcome?  What have I always wanted to do, but have been afraid of trying?  Am I truly happy? If I resist this change, will I be able to stop the outcome?

Whatever happens, may it be for the highest and best good.  May you be in perfect trust that you are being provided for at all times by a very loving Universe.  Allow yourself to be happy.

More Real Life photos

These are shots from local ponds and lakes in our area.  Now that my car has a GPS, I am the mad explorer.  I don't worry so much about getting lost and love stumbling upon hidden gems.

Hollow

Finished

Lake

Less Traveled

Roots

Solitude

Turtle Pond 1

Turtle Pond 2

Turtle Pond 3

Underwater 1

Underwater 2

Waiting

Real Life

I purchased a new camera around the time of Mother's Day, because of the need to photograph larger canvases.  My scanner only works up to 11x14 and I wasn't fond of the way my acrylic paintings looked.  Little did I know that my camera would turn into another creative outlet for me.  I began taking shots while out and about.  These are some recent pictures from around my local pond.

Leaving Messages

Flowers in the Muck

Perspective

Sacred Spiral

Falling Down

Lines & Broken Wings

Take Flight (Do you see the bird on the branch about to fly)

Which Way?

Latest selfie of me...aka Wonder Woman